You have a ve and your friend has a de, yet he is telling you how to set up your ve?
If you cant get a whole of a chipped ecu, use your stock ve ecu, ve maf, 2.5 or 3" exhaust, JWT Pop or other type of pop caharger, get a rpm switch (Greddy MSS, MSD RPM Switch, Vtec Controller, Granatelli Switch) and try switching at between 4800 to 5100 rpm.
If you are using a DE header, make sure it's port matched for your motor, especially if it's the older types.
I dont think you need a programmed ecu to beat your friend red top de. Even with a 7200 rev limit he should be easy food for you.
Otherwise please get your car sorted out properly.
Peace